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More Sex, Lies, and Web Sites
by John DAgostino, Eccentric Outsider Artist, a.k.a. the John Dog
 CIA Claims she Swallows
I found another nasty CIA Smear Report. Of course none of it is true. I also found something interesting when I checked my web stats for September. The MSN spider visited my site over 400 times. But even more interesting is that the US Government had 29 hits on my site. I didn't think there were 29 people in the US government who even knew what eccentric outsider art was. Makes you think, doesn't it? The report is printed below with my comments in brackets.
The "Anatomy of a Big Night Out with the John Dog" a CIA report
Research into the habits people who know the eccentric outsider artist John DAgostino, a.k.a. The John Dog brought to light information that we long ago suspected. "What is most alarming of all is the fact that young women seem to be risking more than ever," said a CIA chief executive Jim Cousins. In the report, based on interrogations of people on 3 continents revealed that:
- 36% of women said they had been attacked after getting drunk with the John Dog.
(she hit me first)
- 34% of young women said they had had unplanned or unprotected sex after drinking too much booze while drinking with the John Dog
.(she said she was on the pill)
- 59% of women said they had got into an argument with their boyfriends or husbands after drinking with the John Dog.
(she said she was unattached)
- "Women are getting into more fights, more arguments and are being arrested or cautioned by the police more than young men who associate with the John Dog."
(CIA plot to cut off my babe supply)
- 47 % of women had been arrested or warned by the police compared to 16 percent of men who associate with the John Dog. (ditto, with FBI help)
- 20% of women had been injured because of an accident after getting drunk with the John Dog.
(women are always falling at my feet)
- 12% of men said they had faced a sex assault after drinking too much with the John Dog
(that's cause they can't get it the way I can)
- 83% of those questioned said they had taken a sick day off work after a big night on the booze with the John Dog.
(wussies)
- 33% of interrogated said they drank too much because they had a bad day or week at work and that the John Dog just happened to be in the same bar.
(people will say anything when their balls are in a vise)
- 31 % said they drank with the John Dog to feel more confident because the John Dog is such a loser that it makes them feel less inferior.
(ditto, but with electric shock)
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